A BIT ADVICE TO WIVES AN’ MEN
Ye wives an’ men, gin ye’d always agree,
Jist tak’ a bit advice frae me,
And ye shall find, thro’ marrit life,
Ye’ll aye be free o’ bitter strife;
Ye’ll also find, in this sinfu’ warl’,
How to prevent many a quarrel.
As ye are marrit for better or worse,
The wife should always carry the purse;
But aye when for siller the gove’nor seeks,
She never should try tae put on the breeks;
To keep her ain place is the only safe plan,
Aye to be able to please the guidman.
Gin there be a clash at the heid o’ the stairs,
Aye watch number one, min’ yer ain hoose affairs;
Aye love ye yer nee’bour as ye wad yer ain sel’,
Ne’er let yer tongue be an auld clinkum bell;
Be kindly and civil to both friend an’ foe,
But yer family affairs let nobody know.
Noo a bit of advice for the gove’nor’s ear –
Gin ye spend a’ yer cash on gambling or beer,
Gin ye, when in company, be rather outspoken,
Yer acquaintance for you’ll no care a doken,
But gin ye behave an’ yer hame no neglected,
Wherever you go, ye’ll be highly respected.
